
I’ve been really keeping up on my news these days, and I’m starting to get really very irritated by the story of those Italian guys who almost died on the K2 mountain. I know 11 other people died, and that’s always a tragedy, but these things are somewhat common in DEATH DEFYING HOBBIES, especially when you’ve chosen to scale the most difficult vertical climb ON THE PLANET! Nobody seems to really care about all the people who couldn’t survive, instead, I just have to keep seeing pictures of some guy who looks like he’s one dilapidated shack away from being the Unibomber, who suffered some frost bite on his toes. That has to be the most sissy sounding injury ever for such an “incredible” story of survival. What about that dude who got his arm stuck between two rocks and cut it off himself with another jagged rock? Now there’s a mountain climb gone wrong-complete with severed limbs and lots of blood. I used to get frost bite on my toes building snowmen in my front yard. Sure, theirs was probably a bit more severe, but it just sounds funny to hear ‘frostbitten toes’ to me. Hopefully their mom’s made them some cocoa. Always worked for me. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to feel sympathy for these guys or what, but I never told them to literally “try and go where no man has gone before”. What do you expect? Just go to Sandals next time you’re looking for a fun, action-packed vacation. I hear the pools are great.

It’s also good to see that Mr. Morgan Freeman is back in good spirits and walking around after flipping his car several times into a ditch. I feel that Morgan is going to have a lot of explaining to do, as he was driving the car of his 48 year old female passenger. You know the whole time those jaws-of-life were aggressively pulling apart the crumpled metal of the car, all Morgan was thinking was, “How the hell am I going to explain this to my wife?” If I’m him, I play up the ‘I almost Died’ angle until she can no longer question his motives. Props to the Freeman though for pulling in some tail 23 years younger than he is. That would be like me and a girl who was born today. I’ll put that on my bucket list, but not for at least 17 years.